The Insouciant Sojourner

A Response to Kimmy

2006-03-26T10:42:00.000+08:00

In her blog, Thoughts and Whatever Else, Kimmy writes her musings on love in her entry, "Pano kung love na nga?" I read her piece and wrote a few comments. Some days later, we saw each other and had a little chat...

Kimmy: Paano mo alam kung love na nga? Kasi pwede mo namang i-rationalize eh.

Terence: Kaya nga maganda yung sinulat mo. Tama ka, madulas nga ang pag-ibig, lalo na kapag akala mong hawak na hawak mo na. Hindi sadyang mabibitaw. Mahuhlog. Mababasag. At dahan-dahan mong itatagpi muli. It is not rationaliztion when a person loves from a deep acceptance of brokenness, hurt, vulnerability, and need for wholeness---at the same time facing these with courage and hope.

Kimmy: And this goes for friendship, too.

Click HERE to access Kimmy's blog-entry refered to earlier.

Hindi Ko Siya Crush!

2006-03-21T12:20:00.000+08:00

Hindi ko siya crush!
Mahal ko siya, damn it!

--from a recent conversation with Eugo about life and love

Women and Learning

2006-03-18T18:38:00.001+08:00

Women are born learned,
While men acquire their learning from books.

--Indian saying

Writing Prose: An Effect of Stress While Writing My Thesis

2006-01-30T18:12:00.001+08:00

I'm so stressed out writing my thesis! Kung anu-ano na lang ang naiisip ko. Ngunit katwa! Pasasalamat pa rin ang binibigkas kong mga salita. Tila may grasya pa ring nadarama... 30 January 2006 / 6:12 p.m.

amidst the lack and longing,
of hopes, unfulfilled,
we look to stars a-shinin',
on nights the wind is still.

we learn to say "i'm sorry,"
we say "yes, i do forgive."
we learn to say god loves us,
for all the gifts he gives.

and when we say "i thank you,"
for all the years fulfilled,
we also say "i love you."
we walk on paths we build.

ACLC and the Loyola Schools Awards

2006-01-28T17:16:00.000+08:00

The bias I had while writing this recommendation letter was the fact that I was an ACLCer when I was in college myself. Hehehehehehe. :-) I wrote this letter in less than five minutes, rushing to meet the deadline, as Geo-Ann, ACLC President, waited for it. Though it could've been written more consicely, I was pleasantly surprised by the way this letter came out... Medyo ma-drama, hahahaha.

January 28, 2006

Awards Committee
Loyola Schools Awards for Service and Excellence

To Whom It May Concern:

Peace of Christ!

I would like to recommend the ATENEO CHRISTIAN LIFE COMMUNITY as MOST OUTSTANDING ORGANIZATION for this year's awards.

I recommend the said organization for several reasons.

Firstly, because of the regular formation activities that its members go through, empowering them to be better servant leaders of the larger community they belong to. ACLC prides itself with a four-fold formation program that integrates spirituality, socio-political and cultural awareness, apostolic service, and community life. These are not slogans that are simplistically placed on brochures. The organization draws from a long tradition of excellence, owing to its existence as the Sodality of our Lady--as it was called before--which began centuries earlier. All the members of the organization go through weekly prayer sessions that are based on the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius. Apart from this strong institution, members are required to go through a week long silent Ignatian retreat, held during the semestral break. Such intense formation is not left without a corresponding response of action. The educational aspect of ACLC formation tries to ground its members on current events and issues, as well as the nuances that come with appreciating a lay vocation that comes with the Christian Life Community which members are hopefully open to after college. I shall talk about the aspects of apostolic service and community life as my two subsequent reasons why this organization deserves to be the recipient to this year's award.

Secondly, because of the apostolic impact their endeavours have, particularly the quality of service they bring with their presence. ACLC has been traditionally associated as going to Payatas every weekend for apostolic work with the communities there. What I feel is of particular relevance is how this organization has continually adapted itself in the apostolate area, given that they have been present in Payatas for over three decades now. Through the years, ACLC has learned to specialize on particular needs of the community. Hence, there are groups that focus on tutoring, or groups that prepare children for the sacraments, etc. This allows for greater efficiency of service. But more than just that, ACLC has also learned to synergize with other groups such as Gawad Kalinga, ACMG, and Days with the Lord. These are different groups with different apostolic interests, but whom ACLC has been able to work with in bringing about positive movements in the area. Of significant interest also is the yearly Adopt-A-Child program that ACLC organizes wherein the larger Ateneo community is given the opportunity to sponsor a Christmas party for the children of Payatas. During the culminating activity of AAC, Payatas kids whom ACLCers engage with each weekend are brought to Ateneo for a fun-filled day of activities, a most memorable Christmas gift indeed! However, it would be an injustice if I were simply to go on enumerating concrete activities of which to laud ACLC. I think at the very heart and soul of an apostolic zeal to be effective and efficient is that greater apostolic heart to be simply present. The way by which ACLC has shown its simple yet potent presence year after year in Payatas is a sign of a heart bigger than what all particular projects can achieve. The simple dedication of coming to school each weekend and commuting to Payatas just to spend time with the communities and children there is not just a current testimony to the character of ACLCers, but an anticipation of these young men and women are also be sources of apostolic inspiration in the future.

Finally, because of the possibilities they open up to what it means to be a loving community in the context of our modern day society. It is no secret that Ateneo faces a concrete concern these days: What does it mean to be an Atenean in a globalized culture of consumerism and media? Where do our ideals of service, love of God, and love of country enflesh themselves amidst modern realities and fast-paced changes of values? I think the significant contribution that ACLC provides the Ateneo landscape is in its capacity to provide a space for an alternative lifestyle of being Christian, of being Filipino, of being human. ACLCers are, at best, ordinary people who confront real issues. They face questions that have to deal with what jobs they can pursue, how much they should spend on cellphones and gadgets, whether they can rightly or wrongly spend luxuriously on this or that trend. They confront issues as to whether they can still have faith in God in a postmodern world, how really relevant prayer and the sacraments are, what does it mean to be Christian. They engage with the realities of government in crisis, of the seeming lack of hope in the country, of many of their fellow countrymen leaving for elsewhere. Yes, ACLCers are ordinary people who face such complex questions. And inasmuch as it can be such a temptation for the ordinary Atenean to box out the world or to be boxed in by its secular tendencies, ACLCers somehow find in their little pockets of space--be it in Matteo Ricci, or in their group discussions or prayer sessions--the capacity to face these questions like a real Atenean would: with a bit of seriousness, because these are important things that affect lives; but with a light-heartedness as well, because blessings abound. For this is, after all, the most secret grace of ACLCers: their capacity to stay together inasmuch as they committedly work with each other in building community. ACLCers take care of one another, and challenge each other with values they themselves are struggling with. They call this "The Way of Life," not because this has already been engraved in stone, but precisely because they find that the crux is upon their shoulders to continually redefine what this personally means to them as individuals and as a group. It is in such idealism, tempered by rounds of card games and jamming at the Matteo Ricci steps, that ACLCers have learned to have faith. As they struggle with complexities they have inherited from previous generations, theirs is a journey they do not have to take alone. For they have each other as friends to guide them forward.

If there may be any questions or concerns, feel free to contact me at Loyola House of Studies, telephone number 4266101. Or you may reach me at the Philosophy Department, local 5360.

Thank you very much.

In Christ,
Terence Christopher Go Ang

A Conversation with Karen

2005-08-20T02:44:00.000+08:00

'hate you.

'hate you, back at you.

'hate you, back at you, also!

'hate you, back at you, also, but even more!

'hate you like the smell of rotten fish and stinky old socks.

'hate you like the taste of blended squid gut and mashed stink bugs.

'hate you with the yuckiness of osterized pigs' eyes.

'hate you so much -- talk to the hand.

'hate you so much -- I puke when I see your face.

'hate you to the f(x).

'hate you to the undefined value of 1 over 0.

'hate you to the value of x raised to the power of infinity!

'hate you to the the hidden mysteries of the universe!

'hate you to the inner depths of Being!

...sige na nga, I don't hate you anymore.

Zhu Ni Sheng Ri Kuai Le

2005-08-19T07:43:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday Yan Mei!

For those who don't know, our friend Yan Mei Zheng was featured in this month's edition of Chinoy, the publication of Celadon. The article talks about her experiences adjusting to life in the Philippines after migrating here from China. It also talks about some challenges she had growing up. Check it out if you haven't read it yet!

Yan Mei, you've truly come a long way! We are so proud of you!

Badminton: My Muscles Hurt

2005-08-18T09:58:00.000+08:00

The last time I played badminton was over a year ago. And so it was to be expected, I guess, that my muscles would hurt after playing last night... Well, they do now.

I'm quite the novice when it comes to this game. What I like about it, though, is that I have to run around trying to hit the shuttlecock--which pretty much leads to a very good cardiovascular workout. Hehehehe. But really, it's fun when you're playing with your friends.

Next week again?

On Exercise

2005-08-17T02:34:00.000+08:00

What I'm proud of: I'm happy to say that I've been able to consistently have my physical exercise virtually everyday these past three weeks. Yehey! Kahit hindi lang nga obvious--sabi ng iba--exercise pa rin 'yon! Half an hour on the cross-trainer. Then I lift weights. Whew!

Pero kahit papaano naman, sana mapansin-pansin ko rin na I'm losing weight! Hehehehe. It's good for my heart, right? According to the scale, I've lost two kilos since I started. Someone told me that what I've lost is just water. Hahahahaha. Oh well, so I guess it gets harder after that...

On a more quiet note, things have also been moving forward in the realm of my spiritual exercise. I've changed my formal prayer period to the middle of the day. Why? Well, I'm just too groggy in the mornings and too tired at day's end. It just doesn't work for me at these times! Hmm... But won't I get sleepy praying after lunch? Perhaps. Kahit itong lumipas na dalawang linggo, since I've changed my prayer schedule, I find myself nodding off every so often. Oh well, ganyan talaga. Sanayan lang siguro. But on that note, I guess it's a matter of discipline, too, to just keep at it. Sabi nga ng SD ko, ipagpatuloy ko lang kahit inaantok-antok ako minsan, kasi may nangyayari pa rin sa akin sa dasal kahit hindi ko man ito napapansin. Amen to that!

Para Kay Padre Roque Ferriols

2005-08-16T13:28:00.005+08:00

Maligayang bati, Padre, sa iyong walumpu't-isang taong pagmemeron!

Today, Roque Ferriols, SJ, father of Philosophy in Filipino, celebrates his 81st birthday. With great warmth, I thank Fr. Roque in a special way for being a mentor and companion on this journey of wonder and insight. It was he who first initiated me to the intellectual rigor that philosophy demanded, back when I was an undergrad in college.

At our simple birthday lunch at the Philosophy Department, Dr. Leovino Garcia, dean of the School of Humanities, recounted a story that took place around 40 years ago. Doc Leo was graduating from college then. As a gift, Fr. Roque and his companions arranged for Doc Leo's parents to be present for the commencement exercises. Doc Leo's parents came from Northern Luzon. But it was not just this kindness that was etched in Doc Leo's memory. Back then, people who traveled often had to take the bus. There was no such thing as reservations for tickets or air-conditioning in the buses. If you wanted to take the bus to go to the province, you went to the bus terminal and tried your luck. As soon as a bus was available, all those wanted to ride on it had to literally rush in and elbow their way to available seats. Such were the conditions that Frs. Roque Ferriols and Joe Cruz found themselves in as they tried to assist Doc Leo's parents on the return trip home. The two priests ran alongside a bus that was coming into the terminal to make sure they would be among the first to get seats. Quite a tall order, it seems.

Doc Leo adds how Fr. Roque, apart from trying to run as fast as the moving bus, also managed to jump in through the window head first. After getting seats, the Jesuit tandem were seen on the roof of the bus, securing boxes and baggages for Doc Leo's parents. They were both wearing their white soutanes, unconcerned that these may be soiled by what they were doing. An image worth remembering! What Jesuits these were, utterly without hesitation to be of service! Such cura personalis!

After his little story and with the rapt attention of those around, Doc Leo turns to Fr. Roque and asks, "Do you remember, Father?" His response: "In a way." We all laughed so hard. So did Fr. Roque.

Salmon Belly Sinigang

2005-08-15T20:23:00.001+08:00

Unprecedented--at least in my life... I've heard of stories similar to what I'm going through now, but this is the first time this has happened to me... Funny, actually. It reminds me of drinking too much beer...

Hilong-hilo ako ngayon. As in! Bakit? Dahil sa Salmon Belly Sinigang. Pero ang sarap niya talaga! I think that was the first time it was served for merienda after the departmental meeting. Pero ang sakit ng bantok ko ngayon! Nyek. Padugo-dugo pa ang ilong ko. Tila high-blood pressure. Teka, ganito ba iyon? Hahahahaha.

Oh, what yummy fish fat that was. Hahaha! Gluttony. Tsk, tsk, tsk...

I left class early. 'Needed to just rest a bit. I'm brewing some tea now. 'Hope that helps... I'll spend this little quiet time preparing for my class tomorrow morning. I think I might give a quiz...

Post-Breakfast Nap

2005-08-15T07:32:00.003+08:00

Haaaaaaaay... Ang sarap matulog pagkatapos mag-almusal...

Tapos 'yung tipong magigising ka na lang uli 'pag manananghalian na! Ayun! Tumpak!

Buhay baboy talaga...

Sayang. Hindi ganyan ang umaga ko ngayon... Hmph.

My Brother: A Rocker

2005-08-14T21:42:00.000+08:00

This is my dear brother. Lawrence has always been good with the guitar. He has often outdone himself in this area. I think it all started one summer when he was still in high school. Was it just boredom? Who knows... Anyway, beyond the few formal sessions of guitar lessons he took, he would practice for several hours each day just to get himself more familiarized with what he was playing. Such dedciation! Well, what can I say? I really hope I can follow in his footsteps and learn the guitar myself.

Lawrence plays guitar for SIMIAN CREASE. Where did their band get their name? Beats me. Maybe he can tell me someday. They play hard rock. Is that the same as heavy metal? Whatever.

Anyhow, they played at El Pueblo, Ortigas Center, last Friday. He should have told me. I would've watched. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Parang ayaw mo namang manood ako ng performance mo eh! Hehehe. Joke only, bro! But really, I will make it a point to watch at least one of your shows. Then let's have one of those eat-all-you-can adventures after... Oh, we're sure to enjoy that! Hahahahahaha!

So far they've recorded three songs for an upcoming release by October. October? Ba't ang tagal pa? Lawrence! Gusto ko 'yung sa akin, autographed copy, ah! At siyempre, libre din. Hehehehehe.

So when's your next gig? Sabihan mo naman ako!